Back in the Saddle

Yellowstone was great--proof that my dad and I are friends, which is cool. Some things I learned o this trip: I'm a pretty ok fisherman, mosquitoes love the taste of my blood and Nate English is engaged. Also, people are idiots on vacation. Ask any hotel manager, any state or national park staff or pretty much any shopowner in Leavenworth and they'll tell you what I just said--people on vacation are idiots.

Having grown up in a tourist town has changed how I do the tourist thing. At times I'm overly sensitive to doing typical 'tourist' stuff and never take any risks... and living in Central Asia for two years changed me too... so now I fight the paradox within: the urge to blend in and dissapear and the urge to wear the stars and stripes and shout in English on the streets of Namangan.

I didn't get the apartment in Magnolia, on a completely different topic. I'm borowing Brady's car (again!) and going to look at a few more today and tomorow. I called 10 numbers yesterday and got 2 actual people. One of the eight messages I left has returned my call. Bastards.

Actualy, it's not all bad... when my phone rings I have no idea who it is or why they're calling and that's stressfull. So if they're not calling back, I can just call them names on the internet and feel justified.

Also, I can't set up my voicemail. The instructions in the book are useless, with the same useless information on the website.

The Mariners came fro behind to win! We're over .500! My goal for the season has been achieved and it's not even July!

I have today and tomorow to find an apartment. Pray for me.

Yellowstone

I'm going to Yellowstone tomorow. Well, starting the journey, anyway. It's a little more than a day's drive from here. This is great because I get time in the woods fishing with my dad. This is bad because I haven't heard back about the aprtment I applied for on Thursday around noon OR have I heard anything from Horace about my ESI acount. I emailed him over two weeks ago (and again three or four days ago) about getting my money back but something's not right. Probably something to do with their server being down but... still... stressfull.

Church in English is still weirding me out. Going to services in Russian and Old Slavonic every Sunday made me give up some of my fundamental assumptions about going to church. I had to give up being fed, for example. I never got ANYTHING from a sermon, nor was I able to sing the songs very well. I also had to give up participating. I can't very well teach Sunday school if it A) doesn't exist and B) is in Russian. I even had to learn the flow of the Orthodox liturgy, how to cross and how to bow. I never did take communion, mostly because it would require a confession of sins to the preist, who, you guessed it, speaks Russian. I suppose I could have muscled my way through it with a simplified list and a dictionary, but that's a whole new level of intimidation I wasn't ready to face this past year. I also had to give up belonging, knowing I would never, truly, belong to this body. I would always be a foreigner to some degree.

So what was left if my primary reasons for going to church were gone?

Quite a suprising lot, actually. I had plenty of time to monitor my thoughts, ask questions and wonder. Am I reverent? Is my heart singing? Where is my mind? (Pixies ref) Why am I here? Why am I judging them? Isn't this beautiful?

It was a lesson in being with God instead of getting from or doing for God. He doesn't need me, but he loves me. How does that work? Can I let myself be loved like that, like a father loves his child (ideally) apart from what I have to offer? Giving up the need to be needed... hmm...

Hoo, what a day. I'm exhausted and I didn't actually DO anything except talk on the phone and drive all over Seattle. I was doing great in Brady's car too until this evening when I killed it three times on the way home in stop-and-go traffic. That's a bad time to have a stick. Otherwise, it's been great driving again. I've got a lot of leads--everyone talks about how expensive Seattle is, but it seems like I'm finding lots of places in the neighborhoods I want in the price range I want.

Since I don't have a job and can't afford anything, it's fun to look around. I saw some flats that started at $1200 (1 bed, 1 bath), not counting the $250 per month for parking. Booyah. Right now I've got leads around Northgate, Magnolia, Shoreline, Lakewood 85th Street and even one downtown.

Oi.

Mamma mia

Blogger is being stupid and has eaten two posts in the last day or two. Idiots.

I really like the little Italian guy in "Cars".

I also spent five minutes looking for my passport before I remembered I don't need it before going outside. I also get dirty looks and scoled because I'm slow to remember seatbelts are normal and usual here, as are green salads and crazy, crazy dressings. The bank, post office, buying a cell phone and a few other things as well as hitting up the dry cleaning place and trying to get some glaze for dad isn't a week's itenerary but a day's: crazy. As long as I remember the toilet paper goes in the toilet, I'm ok. Plus, I've stopped looking in the fridge for drinkable water.

I hear CAFE is out of Uzbekistan now. This sucks for a lot of people, but mostly for a family I know who's visa was through them and my old Uzbek tutor. Sad.

I'll be heading to Seattle monday sometime (maybe in the AM for the US v Czchchz Repulic?) to check out this list of apartments and jobs I have. Hopefully someone will want to rent to two unemployed history majors.

Some great WC action out there too: Trinidad (AND Tobago!) crashing Sweeden's party with a nil-nil draw and Ivory Coast giving Argentina a run for their money were really fun to watch. Now I need to decide who I want to lose more: Iran or Mexico?
In short, there's a lot to pray about.
I'll see some of you Sunday!

"Home" again

I've arrived safe and sound with my luggage. Traveling this far west this fast is always a little wierd, but, whatever. I'm in Leavenworth after half a day's worth of delays and missed connections. Good thing I like the Denver airport. They have burritos there. You can't get those in Karaganda, or even Alamty or Franfurk. Mmm... burritos. Anyway, I got to Leavenworth around 4:30 this morning and slept 'till noon. Aparently I was tired.

Culture shock is already hitting me harder this time around... pray for my fight against paralysis in the face of so much to do and so many choices. I'm starting small, so right now I'm trying to do email, look through my regular mail, unpack and pick out tuxedos and explain Tarkan and Arash to my mother.

I've got two weeks to find an apartment, car and a job!

End Time

This'll be my last post for a while--I'm saying goodbye to Karaganda tomorrow and Kazakhstan on Wednesday. I have a great life, but this moment is still bittersweet. I'm also debating wether to keep the blog going or not. Even if I do, it's not going to be huge priority as I've got biger fish to fry these days.

Paka!